No contact for 30 days.
Let’s have a look at what it means and whether or not it’s a good idea to follow this rule.
Maybe you are going through a breakup right now.
Or maybe your relationship has already ended and you want to get over the woman you once called your girlfriend.
Maybe you were even going through a divorce and you want to get over this divorce and the best possible way.
No matter in which of these three situations you are in right now, I want to show you how you can get over your breakup or divorce by either following the contact for 30 days rule or not.
Let’s first have a look at what this rule really means…
1. No contact for 30 days: What it means
It’s very simple.
The no contact for 30 days rule means exactly what it says.
It means that you should avoid any form of contact with your ex-partner for at least 30 days.
No texting, no calls, and for sure no physical meetings.
That’s the whole idea behind the no contact for 30 days rule.
Now let’s have a look at whether or not this rule makes sense and if it can help you to get over your breakup or divorce.
2. Pro: You can focus on your healing
One of the biggest advantages of the no contact for 30 days is that it allows you to focus on your healing.
I hope you don’t have any physical healing to do from your breakup but I’m confident that you have emotional and maybe even mental healing to do after this experience.
Not contacting your ex-girlfriend or your ex-wife for at least 30 days gives you the chance to focus on yourself.
It gives you time to explore different healing modalities, to work on yourself and to overcome your trauma.
This is a huge advantage of no contact for 30 days.
3. Con: By ignoring your ex she will most likely move on
This is a hard pill to swallow, especially if you’re still hoping to get your ex-girlfriend back.
Or maybe you even want to get your ex-wife back.
No matter if she has been your wife or your girlfriend, if you don’t contact her for 30 days she might move on.
This might sound brutal but the truth is that women tend to move on faster after a breakup or divorce than men.
That’s not true for all women but on average I would say that it’s definitely true.
As a result, if you don’t contact her for 30 days she might already have a new man.
This can be a disadvantage if you were thinking about getting back together with her.
4. Pro: By ignoring your ex she will most likely move on
Yes, you read that right.
I want to say it again.
By ignoring your ex she will most likely move on.
But this time I don’t want you to see it as a disadvantage but as an advantage.
Even if you might want to get back together with her, you might have to realize, that you’re not that compatible.
A lot of men who go through a breakup believe that they can’t find a woman who’s better than their ex-girlfriend.
This is of course not true.
The truth is that there are thousands of women out there who are way better for you than your ex-girlfriend.
If she was the woman of your dreams, she would still be with you.
5. Con: the exact number of days doesn’t matter but the principal does
That’s one thing that people often ignore when it comes to the no contact for 30 days rule or similar rules.
30 days is just an arbitrary number.
It’s not set in stone.
In the end, it doesn’t matter if you don’t have any contact for 20 days, 30 days, or 40 days.
The principle behind this rule and the idea behind this rule is what matters.
It gives you time, and it provides you with opportunities.
That’s why the no contact for 30 days rule is so effective, or at least it can be effective.
6. Pro: you have time to focus on building your life
You want to create a new life for yourself.
This is the most important thing that you can do after a breakup.
The worst mistake you could possibly do is to stay stuck in the past.
Don’t stay stuck in the past.
Focus on your future.
There’s a bright future ahead of you.
But you can only experience this bright future if you allow yourself to create it.
Create this future for yourself and your dating life will be better than it has ever been.
7. Con: She might want you to contact her but is afraid to do it herself
This is one of the biggest disadvantages of the no contact for 30 days ago.
She might want you back.
And if you also want your back, but you don’t contact her again, she will assume that you no longer want her.
Then she might move on and date another guy even though she would have chosen you if you had contacted her.
This is one of the toughest situations to be in.
That’s why I give you the following advice:
If you can logically come up with reasons that make you assume that she’s still into you and you want the same, then you can contact her.
8. Pro: It gives you time to think about whether or not you want her back
Are you really sure that you want to get her back?
Your emotional and hurt self right now might say “yes of course I want her back.”
Take a closer look.
Take a really close look at your relationship with her and tell me if you are now in a better position that she’s no longer in your life, or if she was actually good for you, your career, and your life in general.
It’s time that you think about whether or not trying to get her back actually makes sense.
In this situation, it’s important that you don’t operate from an emotional standpoint.
Use as much logic and reason as you possibly can. Only then can you figure out if she’s really good for you or if your emotions are taunting the picture.
9. Con: Women can move on fast after a breakup
Remember what I said earlier in this article about the no contact for 30 days rule.
Women tend to move on fast after a breakup.
The longer you wait until you contact her, the more likely it is that she has moved on.
That’s why if you want her back and you assume that she wants to sing, you might want to act fast and contact her today.
Is there a possibility that she will reject you?
Sure, but you never know unless you try.
10. Pro: No contact for 30 days gives you the opportunity to meet an amazing woman
I wanted to save this point for the end of this article about the no contact for 30 days rule.
I already mentioned that your ex-girlfriend or your ex-wife might not have been that good for you.
Who says that you can’t meet the woman of your dreams within the next 30 days?
Everything is possible.
She could be in the same coffee shop that you go to after work tomorrow.
She could be working at the same company where you have an interview scheduled for next week.
You never know when you bump into the love of your life.
The no contact for 30 days rule gives you the time to meet a woman with better for you than your ex-girlfriend or your ex-wife could have ever been.